funeral ideas, memorial ideas

I created my alternative funeral arrangements when I was 12 years old, I wanted my family and friends to memorialize me in a way that was a reflection of my favorite pastime. It was to be held at my favorite ice cream parlor, decorated with balloons and giant picture of me and everyone was served bubble gum ice cream. My parents thought it was childhood imagination, my friends thought my funeral planning was “cool”. As I look back, it was far from the traditional service held at a funeral home with a casket surrounded by flowers; day long wakes and church services with register books and prayer cards.

At the funeral home the first words you may hear from the funeral director is “we have your loved one here and we need to make arrangements for the body”.    One purpose of the funeral is technical, to take care of the body or as I like to say “the shell” of a loved one.    There are options and procedures to know about before making a decision regarding embalming, burial, cremation, and what to do with the ashes.   The person with the legal authority to make arrangements in order are:   Durable Power of Attorney for Healthcare aka DPOA, spouse, parents, and then children at least 18 years of age.   It is a good idea to discuss funeral plans with all family members and friends involved with direct grief of the death.  

The profession of being a funeral director entails listening every day to strangers voicing their innermost thoughts and feelings, revealing their most private side. After a death has occurred, the funeral director is usually the first person to sit down with the members of a grieving family. A funeral director witnesses people of all ages, cultures and sensibilities breaking down emotionally. The role of the funeral director traditionally has been to make death appear seamless, invisible even, because death is a subject that traditionally has been repressed.